I have a birthday looming; as in it’s days away.
In all honesty, I never look forward to my birthday. It’s always kind of depressed me. It makes me feel like I’m too old to be where I am and too young to worry about being old. Not to mention the BIG day is Christmas Eve and while some people celebrate their birthday all MONTH long, week or weekend, I only get hours. All year-long is a build up to your birthday (if you’re me) then you get about 6 hours before you’re celebrating Christmas.
I used to hate it. Every year I wonder why we don’t celebrate a half birthday for me. Since I’ve had kids I actually like my birthday.
For about 50 days now, they’ve been counting down the days to MY birthday. Sure, it’s probably because they get to open up presents at Grandma and Papa’s house. But to see their eyes light up when they tell me every day what the countdown is, it’s nice. It makes me smile and my heart gets more full.
I am quite literally sitting here, wearing a crown and celebrating me. Why not?
Too often we get caught up in the repetition and comparison of where we are and what our peers are doing. But when it comes down to it, we need NOT to compare but rather appreciate OUR journey.
Sure, being 37 and a bartender / yoga teacher might not have a great appeal to all BUT it does allow me freedom to be at home with my men and in the here and now. When I step outside of the frame, that is my life, and look at the big picture it occurs to me that I’m probably living many people’s dream life. Sitting in a warm home filled with chaos, making memories, reliable cars and work, love in the form of men (young and old), family, freedom and movement; really what more COULD you ask for?
I’m looking forward to this year and can not wait to see where my journey takes me!
Namaste,
Jes xoxo