I don’t think kids should have phones until they are preferably 13, ideally 18. My eldest (11) is growing up in the days of being virtual. It started out with video games, upgrading to the oculus, then school…
Being virtual is EVERYwhere now-a-days.
Kids aren’t the only ones that are virtual either. Work meetings are done online. Working from home is done online, does anyone even remember waiting for dial-up internet?
I was 13 at my friends house, my parents NEVER entertained the idea of owning a computer or the internet (they still don’t), when we started up her parents computer. We’d listen for the unique sound of the dialup internet connection connecting and always have a “tic tok” styled dance party CENTURIES before tic tok was around when we were in! It took us an entire sleepover weekend to download ONE Metallica song.
Those were the days…
Those were the days when kids actually played outside, WITHOUT bringing phones. When kids would spend HOURS in a pool coming up with a synchronized swim routine without recording it and posting it. It was a time of being present, being alive and being connected.
Now kids are connected; to a power source. They go outside, with their phones. I see kids outside McDonald’s, Holiday’s, Target’s…you name it, doing tic tok dances on repeat until they FINALLY get one good take to post. It’s sad when you see entire family’s hooked on electronics while at a restaurant, not even talking to each other just sitting closer than they normally would have at home.
Is digression a disease? Because I think I have it…
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We have a strict rules in our house regarding electronics. Electronics have to be earned and played on the weekends. We believe kids should be kids. (Side note: we really means me…I think kids should be kids, my husband would be fine if they were hooked up all day.)
In my kids friends group, the moms and I have talked about when is a good time to get phones for the offspring. We all thought 12. Twelve seems like an age when responsibility is gaining, hopefully they will know the value of a dollar by then and they probably will want to hang out with us less.
My kid turned 11 this April and unfortunately for me, in June I gave in to the phone.
I had to.
He’s an EXTREMELY shy kid. If he’s not uncomfortable around you, he’ll whisper in my ear the things he wants or needs. While he’s gaining on my height quicker than I’d like to admit, my neck gets sore from leaning all day.
Anyway his secondary buddy, you know…not his immediate core group but the group right after, invited him to his birthday celebration a 4 day leave in Wisconsin Dells.
The kid is so shy I thought he’d turn down the invitation. I was REALLY surprised when he said he’d want to go. I had to ask him 3 times to make sure I heard him right. Every time, he didn’t even hesitate, which made me wonder if I was less ready for it then him.
Immediately his shyness and inability to tell me how things were going got to me. IF he’d want to wish me goodnight, he’d have to ask his friend’s mom if he could use HER phone to call me. Would he bother? Or would I not know how he was doing for FOUR days?
So I caved.
I told my husband I think we should get him a burner phone for the trip. That way we can check in and he can get a hold of us when he needed to. My husband agreed, but it ended up being a better deal to add him to our phone plan instead of getting a separate phone from a competing company.
Then I got this amazing idea, my son gets my phone and I get a new phone! There is nothing wrong with my phone, I just want the phone with the better camera.
Well he ended up getting a new phone, but so did I. I traded in my phone and upgraded to the new iPhone 12. They told me in the store that all my stuff should transfer, even IF I didn’t know all my passwords.
I hesitate when she had me wipe my old phone clean. I trusted her expertise and maybe I should have checked some apps to make sure I was in, like facebook…
Sure, it was on my Home Screen, with that annoying red notification circle, everything MUST be fine!
Except it wasn’t.
A few hours after we left the store, I tried to post a picture I took with my new camera but I couldn’t get in.
It asked me for a password which I didn’t know.
The worst part my boy going out of town… I was messaging his friends mom through messenger which I NO LONGER HAD ACCESS TO! Luckily a friend had her number and it all worked out.
For the life of me I couldn’t remember my password, and Facebook wouldn’t let me pick a new one or reset my old one.
Did I really NEED facebook?
I started asking people should I start a new account, since getting into my original is harder than breaking into a bank.
It turns out people were split. Almost 50/50. Some people hardly use facebook but to sell things, others for recipes, some for connection but mostly it’s to be part of groups.
I decided to not start a new account. Though, I usually use it for party invitations I didn’t feel like I would really miss out. Eventually people would message me to see if I was going, right?
And I’ve been happy! It’s been surprising how much I don’t miss it.
But then it happened…
I clicked on the app, trying to delete it, and it let me in! So I’m back! It will definitely take a backseat, but I am in!